Dating mating personals picture
It’s like the difference between your association for Chinese people being Fu Manchu versus your association being your neighbor John Chang who speaks perfect English and has a job at Google.
This was my experience with poly people upon moving to Berkeley.
And all this despite Mike having two other girlfriends and Alicorn having three other boyfriends including one who lives with her.
I can’t even get angry with people who say polyamory is incompatible with true love. You don’t really want to argue with them so much as take them to a zoo, after which you are confident they will realize their mistake. The other thing people always bring up is the jealousy issue.
They’re just empirically wrong, like someone who remarks confidently that hippos have six legs. I feel like the correct, responsible thing to say at this point would be “Yes, of course everyone experiences jealousy, and it’s hard for the first few months or years, but eventually you just learn to live with it and the sacrifice is worth it.” But the responsible answer is wrong, and the incredulous-stare answer is right.
At least in my very limited experience, jealousy is a paper tiger, sort of the post-9/11 al-Qaeda of emotional states.
I sympathize with it because it was exactly my response when Alicorn told me about polyamory two years ago or so (I can’t remember if I got it from IM conversations with her or from reading her essay).
Brandi Belle Our dirty girl's personal blog Taylor Bowmy exposed ex-girl tapes Big Tits Round Asseswhere our boobies are kept College Wild Partiesour explicit party footage Bang Bros Networkwhere more of our boobies are Orgy Sex Partieslarge groups having sex DRUNK!Alicorn makes a big deal about poly-hacking and having to valiantly overcome some sort of strong natural tendency to switch from monogamous to polyamorous relationships. It just seemed like once the entire culture was no longer uniting to tell me polyamory was something bizarre and different and special, it wasn’t. I didn’t even remember how weird it seemed to everyone else until the last few weeks. Then someone commented on a blog post of mine with something about polyamory, spelling it poly-“amor”-y the whole time, as if there couldn’t possibly be any real love involved. But the singular of anecdote is “enough data to disprove a universal negative claim”.And then it started to look like a slightly better idea to take part in it than to not take part in it. So I will just say that Alicorn and Mike are probably the best couple I have ever seen.It went really well, everyone got along, and it is something we would do more often if not for scheduling and travel issues (also, Sausalito is really expensive).I once felt a small pang of jealousy when one of my girlfriends was having a very public display of affection with a non-Mike person I didn’t know quite so well.