‘I had no idea what I was doing – I met my ex on a night out but I felt a bit too old for clubbing every weekend and, anyway, I have my daughter to think about.’ Feelings were mixed though, and Sarah said the one emotion that she felt the most was guilt.
‘Guilty for moving on, for even thinking about dating, for potentially bringing someone new into our lives, the usual parental guilt.’ Sex and relationship therapist Lianne Young, from House of Ardent, said that while its usual to feel that way – don’t.
‘It was rude but at least I knew not to waste my time.’ You also shouldn’t feel guilty about having to rearrange or cancel dates because of childcare.
Shilpa explained there was nothing wrong with your child being your main priority.
Shilpa Gandhi, certified matchmaker and founder of introduction agency, Amare Exclusive, advised that honesty was the best policy.
‘Always ensure the person you are dating knows that you are a parent.
‘Never reveal your address until you have met the person a few times and you are sure they can be trusted.
‘You may think having children is carrying extra baggage but they’re not.
But Sarah had almost resigned herself to it just being her and her daughter after her relationship with her long term partner dissolved before their daughter turned one.
As things settled into a routine though, she found herself thinking about dating again and turned to dating apps.
‘And always let someone know where you are and who with in the early days.’ You’ve downloaded the app, been on a few dates and maybe you’ve found someone who you can see a future with.
Introducing your children to someone you’re seriously dating will be the next big step and one that Lianne advises shouldn’t be done on a whim.